Survived Rapture

Statue of Christ the Redeemer in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

Photo by Adam Sporka // Flickr Creative Commons

If you didn’t know it (and I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t), the world was supposed to end today, as predicted by one Harold Camping, the leader of a fringe Christian group somewhere in America.

Well, not “end” as in stop, but supposedly Mr. Camping stated that it was his fervent belief that today was supposed to be the rapture – the Second Coming of Jesus Christ, before the actual end of the world, when true believers worldwide would be transported from earth into heaven.

Furthermore, Mr. Camping stated that the actual “end” of the world was on 21 October 2011, and non-believers would face torment and agony between then and the rapture (about five months’ worth of pain, kind of like peak period during audit).

Anyway, 21 May 2011 came.. and went.

While today’s non-event may be easy to ignore and laugh about (Mr. Camping’s previous prediction that the world would end in 1994 was also proven false), it’s a bit harder to ignore the more popular prediction that the world will end on 21 December 2012, especially after Roland Emmerich’s movie disaster of the same name vividly depicted the end of the world with gratuitous amounts of fire, water, ice and other assorted elements.

Personally, I sure hope the world doesn’t end in 2012. I’ve too many things I haven’t done to be ready to go! In fact, in conjunction with the non-rapture today I actually did a bit of preparation of my “Things to Do Before I Die” list, although right now it’s really brief and repetitive:

  1. Fuck a girl I’ve known for more than one year.
  2. Fuck a girl I’ve known less than one week.
  3. Fuck a girl whose name I don’t know at all.
  4. Fuck a gal pal.
  5. Fuck a lady.

For some reason, I foresee an unfulfilling end of the world for me.

If you starred in an end of the world movie, how would your character die?


About Jared

I am all the awesomesauce you could ever want in a handsome, neat package, and you know it.
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3 Responses to Survived Rapture

  1. ken says:

    there are so many things i would wanna do before i die (pre-maturely) too!!!

    1) learn how to fly a plane!
    2) buy my own plane
    3) fly with during the end of the world! 😛

  2. Brian says:

    If the world ends in a zombie apocalypse or an alien invasion , I’ll probably go down guns a blazing. Wouldn’t wanna die hiding in the corner or die while I’m doing my business in the toilet.

    If the world ends like a giant meteor is heading to earth or something like that, well I’ll probably try to use what time I have left…maybe go somewhere I’ve never been or get a girlfriend….(T_T)

  3. calvynius says:

    honestly, I dunno wht I’d do
    maybe just have one final party with friends before everything goes up in flames XP

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